Parental Bartenders
Providing Alcohol to Children
By Daniel Muniz

Every year there are lots of people who believe that they should be given the “parent of the year” award because they have purchased several hundred dollars of beer and hard liquor for their teenage children and provided the use of their house or other property for a party for all of their teenage friends. Consequently, some parents even feel that it is safer for kids to get drunk and lewd under their supervision.

Although parents have been doing this for generations, what is different today is that our modern culture now has fewer if any boundaries and rules for adolescents which results in far more alcohol-driven parties than ever before. In this more permissive atmosphere, adults would rather become their child’s best friend instead of a being a parent. And if it means providing copious quantities of alcoholic beverages for an evening of drunkenness and debauchery, then an increasing number of parents are okay with that.

And for some people, instead of contributing to the delinquency of a minor they actually see themselves as being responsible civic minded parents who are providing a public service by keeping drunken teenagers from driving and offering a safe environment for their carousing and sexual escapades.

First of all, these parents have a false sense of security. It may sound responsible on the surface but not only is it reckless but it is also very dangerous.

Perhaps the greatest threat that is overlooked is that teenagers do not have any true sense of maturity. As a result, they lack the ability to make good judgment calls and have limited decision making skills. And then add alcohol to that. And then add a whole lot more alcohol to that.

The next thing that these parents overlook is that kids are not only going to have a couple glasses of wine or a few beers and call it a night. They are going to drink for the purpose of getting plastered. If binge drinking is already one of the biggest concerns on college campuses with young adults, then how can it be any less of a problem for teenagers who have even less real world experience and wisdom.

Additionally, the physiology of females is far different than that of males. The same two drinks that a male consumes could very well have the effect of three drinks for a female and then multiply that impact if a girl has a total of ten or more drinks. Incidentally, a lot of teenage boys with raging hormones may actually want to see girls drink a certain amount of alcohol because that will remove their inhibitions (and especially their clothes). Such an inebriated state makes girls vulnerable to teenage boys who want to take liberties with them.

Furthermore, there are plenty of full grown adults who already have problems with drinking too much but the situation can be far worse when large numbers of teenagers are in a drunken stupor.

Perhaps the greatest ramification is that these oblivious parents are unaware that they have inadvertently accepted a tremendous liability on the outcome of the drunkenness of the minors they provided alcohol to. A parent can prevent an intoxicated teenager from sneaking out and getting behind the wheel but there is no way a parent can prevent that if there are twenty or thirty or more drunken kids at a party.

In addition, other behavior may be introduced because there are so many inebriated adolescents such as fighting, sexual assault, vandalism, etc., which is something that already happens with adults.

Ultimately, a parent can also be on the hook for any undesirable outcomes. Such liability frequently happens with adults. Bartenders and tavern owners have already been charged with crimes because they served an inebriated customer too much to drink who then injured or killed somebody in a car accident.

Accordingly, there are now many states that are beefing up their statutes that results in much harsher prison sentences if a parent provided alcoholic beverages to a teenager and then he or she killed somebody. There are too many tragic stories of such outcomes simply because driving under the influence and sexual assault stemming from drunkenness is already a big national problem in this country.

And to tip my hat, I am not a teetotaler. I am not opposed to a father and son (or mother and daughter) participating in a rite of passage or any other special occasion by enjoying a couple of beers together. I feel that parents can have the greatest influence on their children by giving them guidance on self-restraint, delayed gratification, and respect for themselves. And most importantly, a parent can teach their child that they don’t have to get plastered at a party in order to have a good time.

However, I am adamantly opposed to the parents who have deluded themselves into thinking that teenagers who have consumed copious quantities of alcoholic beverages in a drunken stupor have somehow entered adulthood. Binge drinking among the youth is a huge problem and these irresponsible parents are not doing their kids a favor by providing them with an unlimited supply of alcohol.

Teenagers are not adults who simply wear smaller clothing. Kids need boundaries and rules and it is up to the parents to establish that. And part of those boundaries is the ability to say no and to make difficult choices. A parent cannot always be their child’s best friend but they can always be a source of structure and guidance.

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